Life No. 1

God has worked in my life in so many different ways this last year! I still feel like I'm gonna wake up from a beautiful dream any second now.

Last spring I graduated from {homeschool} high school, and I really had no idea what I was supposed to do next. I got accepted by a college and I fully intended to start there last fall, but God had other plans. I was pretty discouraged when doors kept closing left and right. I couldn't find a job anywhere, and there was no guarantee I could find one once I got there. I didnt have much saved, and I wouldn't have a vehicle which was going to make things really tricky. Plus I was kind of running from something that I just needed to stop and face. <still working on that one<

I detasseled once more, and ironically a conversation with my daddy in the field on a crazy day changed my life.

Josh + I officially started "courting" and just a couple weeks later, he proposed! Last fall was seriously a whirlwind, and I don't remember much other than I worked at an apple orchards fun farm for 2 months,

Torri AND Kaylee came to Michigan for Thanksgiving break,

and I heard the Messiah for the first time.{B family Christmas Tradition}

Then in January I turned 19, and got married 14 days later.

Married life is wonderful, of course, but it has also taken a lot of getting used to. {Try going from living with other people to just 1! And constantly being with a C R A Z Y 16 year old sister and 2 YEAR OLD brother to being a stay at home wife! ;-P}

oh- and hey people! I'm not perfect.


Looking back I'm totally just in awe. God's plan is always perfect, even if it doesn't seem like it at the time.


And once again I'm kind of in awe of the doors opening up!

I'm officially calling myself a real life blogger. I've blogged sporadically before, but I'm for real now. Internet+domain name+new design+time+money means I'm DETERMINED to do this!

And I'm officially chasing my dream of starting a photography business!!! I'm not going to be your normal photographer though! After lots of research + experimentation + practice I've decided to focus on lifestyle or storytelling photography! I love capturing the little moments of everyday that seem to be forgotten way too often, and Its my dream to capture these moments for others as well!

I have also fallen in love with the art of hand-drawn lettering. I've always loved writing {I would write + rewrite my spelling words for hours on end} and I have finally found a way to put it to good use! ;-P I've opened am Etsy Shop to sell my little hand drawn prints, and I am super excited to plan for some craft fairs + festivals too!

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Speaking the truth...

Last week I realized that I needed a little bit of a boost, so I decided to read through Galatians, Ephesians, Philippians and Colossians. It was a refresher for me- Ive never really read them and focused on what was in them! I got a LOT out of it. I kept my pen handy and underlined verse after verse and wrote lots of notes in the margins of my Bible! J

I just finished Colossians, and this verse really stuck out to me.

//

 I have loved writing for a long time.

When I was little I preferred writing stupid stories where all my friends were part of one huge family. 

When I was 12 I wrote sermons(okay, just my thoughts, but with a TON of salt).

And now…. Now I just write about what I'm thinking and learning. Some of it hurts though, because its real life for me, which is why this blog hasn’t seen much of me lately. It hurts me to write it. It hurts me to finally see the truth of what has been going on around me. It hurts to realize that most people aren’t gonna like what I have to say. They never have.

The funny thing is, usually the reason people don’t like it is because it is the truth. And sometimes the truth hurts.

Sometimes it hurts because we are wrong and someone else is right. Sometimes it hurts because it rocks your entire world and knocks out the foundation you thought was so strong.

The truth is, I’ve been so afraid of people that I’ve been neglecting some things. The hurt in my heart will never go away. My heart is a mess of scars, and wounds, and some of them will never completely heal.

But my hurt and pain has changed me. I'm a different person because of it.

And I wanna share that so that others can learn from me.

I don’t know much about gifts and all that, but I believe God has given me a gift. Writing is a passion of mine. I'm not very good at it, but its something I LOVE to do!

God has given me a ministry. He has opened doors for me to serve Him, and I’ve been pushing them closed. I want to do what God has for me to do, and I'm going to from now on!

I'm going to just say the truth, because that’s what God wants me to do. Even when it hurts. Even when I know certain people aren’t going to like it one bit.

All that to say this. I'm working on some posts. I have maybe 50 or more half-finished on my laptop and notes for that many more in my Bible, in my notebook, in a box, in folders- all over! Look for a piece of paper with my handwriting on it, and that’s probably what it is! =)

It may take me a little while to get things together. I have several projects I'm working on- a ladies fellowship lunch to plan, a devotional to write for that, a blog to redesign, piano to practice, school to get caught up on, a heart to strengthen for the coming battles, and blog posts to plan{I want to get a bunch scheduled to post} etc, not to mention my friend and I are working on a really big project! ;-P

Which is why I am taking the next 3 days off from the internet{more on why I chose 3 days shortly}... {*crossing fingers*} I'm going to try anyways. I'm even deleting some of the apps off my phone so I won’t be tempted! ;-P

So, Lordwilling I will get some posts up for next week. Unless life becomes a crazy hectic mess again. ;-P

Are you really any better?

For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith. -Romans 12:3

What do you think of yourself? Do you think you're a pretty "good" Christian? Maybe you think you're a really "good" Christian? Maybe you think you are better than most? Are you really?

Do you think you are better than other people? Maybe you think you are better because you've chosen to live a set-apart life!? Maybe you think you are better because you haven't made the same mistakes as other people?

Are you really any better?

The Lord has really been working on my heart about this and my dad has cautioned me many times about this too.

Pride. Its a constant struggle of mine!

I hate pride in other people. I mean I HATE it! I rant about it.

I hate it when people are prideful! I hate it when people bash and tear down their "friends" with their words whether its from the pulpit or in an email, or its in the use of too many words or none at all.

But I have to be so so careful that my hate for pride doesn't become pride in my own heart!

***I need to hate the pride in my own life just as much as I hate it in other people.

Its all pride. Anytime we think we are better than someone else its just plain old pride.

Pride is in the tone of voice, its in actual choice words, its in actions. Its in silence too. Its in looking down so much on someone that you refuse to speak to them. Its in avoiding people.

Just because someone has made a mistake, whether big or little, that you haven't, doesn't mean you are any better.

No-one is any better. Not one soul!

I'm no better than anyone else because I have chosen to live differently! And I'm no worse than someone because I've chosen a less traveled path.

I'm a sinner, and me thinking I'm better than anyone else would be me completely forgetting what God has saved me from!

I've made mistakes. But having made those mistakes is a continual reminder that I AM NOT worthy of Christs forgiveness! I don't deserve it!

Sins- wether its pride or immorality or murder are all sins. One is no worse than the others!

These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.

-Proverbs 6:16-19

In fact, have you ever noticed that God hates pride more than murder? And God hates pride more than a wicked heart?

Watch out for pride! Make sure their is no trace of it in your life! Be careful with your words + actions + especially your tone of voice!

Let not the foot of pride come against me, and let not the hand of the wicked remove me. Psalms 36:11

Thou shalt hide them in the secret of thy presence from the pride of man: thou shalt keep them secretly in a pavilion from the strife of tongues. Psalm 31:20

Dear Lord, please help me to stay humble! Help me to not be prideful in my thoughts and words! Lord, help me to not be prideful even in my tone of voice!

the courage to do what is right...

A few months ago, one of my very good friends did something that I really appreciate and admire. He chose to do what was right even though it wasn’t always supported and appreciated. What he did took a lot of courage!

He did the right thing{even though maybe not always the right way}, even though most people don’t agree with it. In fact, some people have even chosen to voice their disgust and opposition of what he did. But he has chosen to stick with his decision and follow through with it!

Therefore to him that knoweth to do good,

 and doeth it not, to him it is sin.

James 4:17

This verse is very clear. There is nothing to question. It plainly says that if someone doesn’t do what God is telling them to do, then they are sinning.

My friend did what the Lord led him to do.

Even through much opposition.

Most people were too cowardly to do what he did. Or they were deliberately blind.

He that answereth a matter before he heareth it,

 it is folly and shame unto him.

Proverbs 18:13

The funny thing is, that every single person who has voiced their disagreement doesn’t know all the details like he does. In fact, most of them have refused to accept the facts that were presented to them. Shame on people who try to meddle in other people’s situations, especially when they don’t know everything!

My friend chose to do something that others refused to do.

Are you standing up for what is right? Are you standing even in the face of opposition? Are you doing right when you know you should? Or are you staying back, being a coward?

My friend made a difference in someone’s life. Are you doing things to make a difference? Are you willing to stand up when you see something wrong?

Having a vibrant relationship with Jesus{Part 2}

Remember the synonyms of vibrant from Wednesdays post?

Vibrant means lively, vivacious, animated, exciting, energetic, alive, bubbly etc.

Sometimes we lose sight of the fact that our relationship with Jesus is a daily thing. We pray for our food{sometimes}, go to church, say “Praise the LORD”, and read the Bible when we have time. What we don’t realize is when we aren’t getting refreshed daily, we become weak and discouraged.

What happens when we don’t eat daily? We get sick and some people even pass out. The Bible tells us that eating real food isn’t enough! {Matthew 4:4} To stay strong we must be in God’s word (daily)!

For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish,

yet the inward man is renewed day by day.

2 Corinthians 4:16

>Do your devotions{DAILY}

I know for some people this goes without saying. But a lot of people struggle with this{the finger is pointed back at myself!}!

There is no one right and perfect way to do your devotions. Figure out what is right for you, and stick with it!

Some people read their Bibles through in a year, so they just read a portion every day. I did this for several years, but found that it really became a chore, and I wasn’t getting much out of it. {I mean seriously- what do you find in books like Chronicles?} {If this is something that works for you, check out this schedule!}

Others find daily devotional books very helpful. This has worked really well for me! {Like I said, its different for everyone! There is no rule about what way is right.} I am currently going through Jesus Calling{Sarah Young}. {another good one is From My Heart to Yours by Glorianne Gibbs or sign up for a year-long subscription to GLOW(that’s one thing I did for most of last year)}

I really like the devotional book because whatever I read that day sticks in my mind! I actually think about it throughout the day, and usually try to put it in to practice!

>Pray

Prayer is so important! When we pray we acknowledge that God is really there. We are saying that we realize that we need Him. Don’t just pray in hard situations. Pray every single day! Set aside a certain amount of time{I started out with 5 minutes} and get rid of all distractions if you have to. I usually try to do this in the morning, but seriously, do it whenever you have the time- on your lunch break, at night before you go to bed, between classes, etc.

I have used a prayer list before{Here is a good one!} as well as a notebook. Both work really well, but make sure you don’t just read down through it. Pray something specific for each person{and "help them to have a good day" isn’t really gonna work}, pray that they would be more patient, or they would accomplish one of their goals, or that God would really work on their heart about something!

//

Make sure you are spending time with God daily! If you have to reorganize your schedule, simplify your life, get up earlier, or give up something, then do it! Believe me, it is entirely worth it!

When you make an effort in your relationship with Jesus, you will see a difference in your everyday life! Not only will you have a better attitude and a more positive outlook on life, but you will also be a LOT Happier! =) Your mindset will be completely different! J

Your Relationship with God {Part 1}

A few weeks ago I shared a little{although I'm told it was long} devotional with a small group of my friends. Ever since then I have really been trying to focus on putting what I shared into practice. I’ve decided to share a little bit of that what I have been thinking on for the last few weeks!

This series is going to focus on our relationship with Jesus, and it will probably span over the next month, since I have a few different posts on the subject already in the works. =) Make sure you check back to read the rest of the series!

I'm ashamed to say that if you had asked me that a month ago I would have ducked my head and tried to avoid the question. It wasn’t going good, not. at. all.

I had lost my focus, and I couldn’t seem to get myself out of the hole I felt like I was in. The Lord really used that time to help me see that I really cant do anything in my own strength! I can do NOTHING. NOT ONE THING!

It was during that time that I read a devotional that is really the whole inspiration for this series of posts. This quote is what really really stuck out to me! 

Vibrant means lively, vivacious, animated, exciting, energetic, alive, bubbly etc.

Our relationship with Jesus isn’t supposed to be a chore, or an obligation.

*think about your relationship with your best friend- 

what is it like?

Usually you have a lot of fun with your best friend. You can be crazy and they don’t care because they are just as crazy! You can talk about almost anything. They know your mistakes, and they don’t hold them against you. And usually, you and your best friend are almost inseparable!

That pretty close to what your best friendship looks like right?

Well, since Jesus is our Best Friend{I mean really, He is!}, shouldn’t our relationship with Him be similar to that?

*Contrary to what some people say our relationship with Jesus can be fun! 

Serving God is fun because it is the only thing that brings true happiness! =)

*God loves you just the way you are. He made you that way, didn’t he? 

He made you different from everyone else, and he loves you that way! =)

*You can talk to God about anything and EVERYTHING. 

He wants you to talk to him because in doing so you are acknowledging that he really is God. 

By talking to Him you are also telling him He is important to you!

*God knows every single mistake you've made- every bad thought thats gone through your head, 

every bad word you've said when no one else was around. 

He knows every single sin, yet he still loves you!

 He loved you so much that He died for you!

*God never ever leaves us! He walks right beside us through every single moment! He is ALWAYS there!

We can have a very personal relationship with Jesus, just like we can with our friends. He like important people who dont have time for us. He is our best friend, and He wants us to make the time to get to know Him better so that he can help and comfort us!

{a little bit of brightness to cheer you up!}

We are complete in Jesus!

For in him dwelleth all the fulness of the Godhead bodily. And ye are complete in him, which is the head of all principality and power: Colossians 2:9-10 

We have access to the throne of God!

Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16 

We know that God will work everything out!

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 

We know that God is for us!

What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? Romans 8:31 

We are conquerors THROUGH Jesus!

Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. Romans 8:37 

We know that NOTHING can separate us from the love of GOD!

Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:39 

We can be confident that God will never give up on us!

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ: Philippians 1:6 

We know that we have been given a spirit of love and power and sound mind!

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7 

filled with Joy and Peace...

v  God gives us joy!

And not only so, but we also joy in God through our Lord Jesus Christ,

by whom we have now received the atonement.

Romans 5:11 

v  God gives us peace!

Therefore being justified by faith,

we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ:

Romans 5:1 

We cant have peace and joy unless we run to God. We can only have true joy and peace THROUGH Jesus Christ. If you look for it anywhere else, you wont find it!

Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing,

that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.

Romans 15:13

Its Monday!

{this is something I wrote yesterday and didn't quite get around to posting...}

We finished the first day of our second {and last!} semester today! WOW! The Lord worked things out for me to spend last weekend with my Aunt and Uncle. I was able to see my cousin for a few hours before she flew back to Florida, as well as spend time just hanging out and relaxing! J

I am very motivated right now, and I want to try to get ahead on some things! I got a lot accomplished today, and hope to get more done!

Things I wanna get done this week…

*keep my room clean

*do devotions and pray every day

*write in my journal every day

*apply for jobs

*practice my instruments every day

*finish thank-you notes

*finish organizing my room

*write 2 posts {other than this one}

*sort pictures and get them printed

*get my eczema down

*redesign blog

Cast thy burden upon the LORD,

 and he shall sustain thee:

he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.

Psalms 55:22

Be not afraid of sudden fear,

neither of the desolation of the wicked, when it cometh. For the LORD shall be thy confidence,

and shall keep thy foot from being taken.

Proverbs 3:25-26

My friend Suzy and I are picking a verse each week for the other to memorize and meditate on. The first one is the one she picked for me, the second is what I picked for her.

Something I've been thinking about.

Kindness: a basic Christian virtue that helps all relationships. {I am really going to be working on being nicer to people this week, especially people I don’t really like. And nice doesn’t mean keeping my mouth shut.}{This was a thought in the Bible Study I'm reading...}

{My Word: FAITHFUL}

  He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much: 

and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much.

Luke 16:10

A lot of people do this word thing. You know- Choose a word and live by it for the whole year. I thought about doing it last year, but since I never got around to it, I'm going to attempt to do it this year! J

I'm choosing something that I need to work on in my character too. Its something I struggle with a lot, but really need to focus on.

My word is FAITHFUL.

1. Firmly adhering to duty; of true fidelity; loyal; true to allegiance; as a faithful subject.

2. constant in the performance of duties or services; exact in attending to commands.

3. true to one's word.

4. True; exact; in conformity to the letter and spirit.

5. Conformable to truth; as a faithful representation.

6. Constant; not fickle.

7. True; worthy of belief. 

{paraphrased from Websters 1828 dictionary}

I need to be more faithful in a lot of things…

*with my devotions and prayer time.

*witnessing to people; this is a hard one since I am a girl. At times I justify things because my simply walking through the store is a testimony to something. But its not enough. I am determined to pass out more tracts- and I have a goal of mailing so many out each week.

*practicing my instruments; I'm not going to get anywhere without putting in the effort. I'm sick of being stuck in one place, and I want to do something about that.

*keeping up with school.

*being myself; so often I am around crowds of judgmental people, and I buckle under the pressure. I end up deciding to not wear certain clothes, say certain things, or do certain things because I am afraid of what they are going to say. And that’s wrong.

*standing up for what I believe; like I said above, too often I am afraid of what people are going to think. Changing my though process about that is something I am really working on, and determined to change. I WILL say what I think and believe, because I believe that it is what GOD says is RIGHT.

*getting things accomplished and prioritizing my time. J

Life...

These past few months have been literally a whirlwind. Time has flown, in both good ways and bad. Facing each day head on has been difficult, but as a dear lady keeps reminding us- God gives the strength to face each day as it comes.

I have been seriously unmotivated for a long time (too long), and this week was a killer. But I finally got some inspiration {probably from all my friends “pep talks” ;-P} to do something…  I have a lot to get accomplished in a very little time, but I am slowly but surely crossing things off my lists.

Through everything that has gone on we somehow got 2 weeks behind. Our goal was to finish our 1^st semester before we took our Christmas break. The normal schedule for our curriculum has us doing our Semester Finals 2 weeks after break, which makes no sense. So we are pushing to get them done by the end of this next week! Its going to be a long haul though.

We finally started working on our bathroom… Or mom repainted it rather! We have the flooring all ready to go, when we get the time. Mom has been doing some painting again, and I'm trying to talk her into doing some for me! ;-D I'm proud of my super creative Mama… she seriously has some talent that she’s been hiding for way too long! <3

My super cute little brother finally started saying my name!!!! J He is so funny sometimes, laughing randomly and giving his mischievous little grin. He learned to climb up on the table, and is obsessed with bread, anything electronic, “cookies” (animal crackers), vacuums, spoons, and his little friend Dee… J

/////

~listening to my favorite song a million times a day…

“Wow… after hitting back everytime my favorite song ended… I just found the repeat button on my ipod! Yay!” {My facebook status a couple days ago…}

~shopping for + wrapping Christmas presents- I tried to have fun this year, and not wait until the week before to buy them, and Christmas Eve to wrap them all! :-P I am, thankfully, almost done! J

~Drinking lots of water and taking my antibiodic + cold medicine + vitamins in an attempt to ward off another cold, or get rid of my first one … After being sick for 3 months, it gets old!

~looking forward to Suzy’s Christmas break… {we are gonna squeeze in a ton of time together!}

~trying to decide what cookies to make for the Cookie Exchange! {I got a cookie book from the library, but cant decide what kind to make…}                    

~laughing with friends always lifts my spirits! J

~reading my devotional book and Bible Study has been something that I have neglected, but this week I started doing it again. Both have really challenged me to have a different attitude when it comes to living life! <3

~enjoying… Christmas music, hot chocolate, red and green, the snow, warm boots, comfy sweaters, watching movies, texting one of my best friends, my Government class {I was never much into politics or anything like that, but its very interesting!}, egg nog shakes,

Trust...

{somewhere in Canada}

 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. 

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Sometimes trust is hard. really hard. 

But. trust is totally necessary. If we don't trust that GOD IS IN CONTROL of every single situation, then we aren't doing right.

Trust- no matter what happens.

Psalm 125:2-3

 As the mountains are round about Jerusalem, 

so the LORD is round about his people from henceforth even for ever. 

For the rod of the wicked shall not rest upon the lot of the righteous;

 lest the righteous put forth their hands unto iniquity.

Psalms 125:2-3 

Guardar- to guard

?Con qué limpiará el joven su camino? Con guarder tu palabra.

“with what does the young clean his way? by guarding your word”

Salmo 119:9

Wherewithal shall a young man cleanse his way? 

by taking heed thereto according to thy word.

Psalms 119:9

The Spanish translation that we use is not exactly like the KJV if you translate it word for word because it was, I think translated directly from the GREEK/HEBREW. I’m not sure of that, but I think that’s the one we are using.

Anyways, if you have ever learned another language, you know that there really isn’t another language as simple as English. Some languages don’t have specific words, some you don’t use the same grammatical set-up.

Spanish is a language that I have been working on off and on for almost 10 years now. I can’t speak it at this point{although at one point I could hold a conversation}, but I can understand a lot of what people are saying, and I can read it. It really isn’t a very hard language to learn once you have the basics down.

Guardar means to guard or to put away.

I knew that guardar meant to guard {duh} but when I read that it meant to put away it really didn’t make much sense, until I thought about it. Obviously if you put something away, or hide it, it is much easier to protect.

Like if you were hiding a fugitive. If you hid him in a cave someplace, it would make protecting him a fairly simple job, but if you just had him follow you all around town, you would be pretty powerless to protect him.

The way to “cleanse” our ways is to take heed to the word of God. We need to hide his word in our hearts. We need to guard our hearts from evil. 

In the Valley

I have this habit of writing down a short note about what I am thinking, and hope that I remember what all I was thinking when I find it months later. I never remember. I found one such note today. I don’t remember when/where/why I wrote it down. I know its been within the last 6 months, but I’m pretty sure that its been in the past 2 months because of what it says.

“There may be pain in the valley,

but look at the joy on the other side.”

That is all I wrote. No explanation. But this is one time that I can guess what I was thinking.

We might be in a valley right now, but sometimes God has to bring us through the hard times before giving us something. It might be really hard in the valley. You might have to go through more than you think you can bear.

God will give you all the strength you need.

If you don’t learn what you have to while you are in the hard times right now, then you might have to start back at the beginning and go through it all again. Make sure you do things right, and don’t try to run from the hard times.

Think about what is on the other side. On the other side of the time of trials is something wonderful. When we reach the prize on the other side there will be great joy and happiness. Think about that when you are having a hard day. Think about what is on the other side! Whatever is over there is definitely worth the waiting, the hardships, and even those days where you want to crawl in bed and sleep for a year. Its worth it, just be patient.

I will remember...

Some people have a tendency to forget things.

Like me. I forget. I forget what I’m supposed to be doing. I forget which track of a cd one of my brothers asked me to listen to. I forget when my best friend’s birthday is. I forget what verse I was trying to memorize yesterday.

Sometimes I forget about what God did for me. I mean seriously- that’s something important, and I forget about it.

Jesus was perfect, sinless, pure. He had lived in heaven, He had been with God since before time. But, for you and for me, he came to earth. Dirty, dusty, filthy, too hot, or too cold, sinfilled earth.

FOR ME!

man. HE did that for me! Wow!

but I forget about it. I forget about it when something doesn’t go my way.

When one of my brothers is being rude, and interrupting, or when one of them is telling me what to do, or when one of them won’t listen.

When one of my sisters is grumpy at me, or when one of them won’t stop talking about something I don’t want to talk about, or when one of them tells my best friend something I didn’t want anyone to know.

I forget, and I get upset. Sure, a lot of the time I just keep it inside, but I still get mad. Sometimes thought, I actually let it all out.

Do you know what Jesus did for me? He was ridiculed, spit on, accused of being a worker of the devil, and worst of all, He was murdered. He had to hang on a wooden cross with nails in his hands and feet. They gave him vinegar to drink{you know how revolting that stuff is?}.

He did all that for me.

And yet, I still forget. A lot of times I don’t want to think about that type of thing. When a teacher taught about it in our Bible class last year, he went into so much detail that I basically “zoned out”. It was nasty, and I didn’t want to listen to it because I was afraid I would get more sick than I was.

It should actually make us sick to think about what Jesus went through, just so that you and I could go to heaven.

Me. the girl who is constantly battling with discouragement, jealousy, bitterness, anger, etc.

but, He died for me anyway, so I can go to heaven to live with HIM for eternity.

Hearts...

  And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, 

to them who are the called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

... because that is all I really feel like posting...

Learning to stay focused...

I have learned a lot in the past week and a half. Sometimes, I feel like I’m just dreaming.

I’m not. I know because I’ve pinched myself. {not really, but I know I’m not dreaming.}

Some things were happy things…  <3 Other things that came with it were hard. I knew things would be hard. I knew it. I know things will get harder, and I’m trying to prepare myself for that.

Wait on the LORD:

be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart:

wait, I say, on the LORD.

Psalms 27:14

Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage;

be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed:

for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.

Joshua 1:9 

In the past week and a half I have been working on writing down verses. Basically instead of making lists to write in my journal later, I just wrote them all down. I think that I have written maybe 20 pages of just verses{and occasional thoughts}. I decided to write them down so that I don’t forget them later when I look back on NOW.

Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him:

Psalms 37:7a

And my soul shall be joyful in the LORD: it shall rejoice in his salvation.

Psalms 35:9 

Even though things are hard right now, I am HAPPY. I know this is what Gods will is. I know that God will give me the strength to go through the really super hard days{I know there will be many of them}. Some people wonder how you can be happy through the hard things. You can’t, really. Not unless you stop focusing on yourself- you have to keep focused on Jesus. Otherwise you won’t be able to function. {believe me please.}

Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation:

the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.

Matthew 26:41 

Stay focused.

The things I’m gonna stay focused on…

*Reading my Bible

*Writing down verses

*Memorizing verses

*Praying

*Studying the Bible